When Friendship Hangs In The Balance.

Today's Marketing Cookie is about discovering the balance and difference between business and friendship.

Several years ago, I came to the sobering realization that while I was friendly, I was without close friends. I had been working so hard to make a living and start my career that I was unable to maintain any meaningful relationships.

While I was trying to support my family financially, I was not actively supportive in any other way. What little energy remained after all had been spent, I donated what was left to my marriage like discarded items given to Goodwill. Regretfully, I had become an absent participant with my family, and I allowed any leftover, lingering friendships to stall, falter, or fade away.

I suppose it was unfair to do so, but in those days, I attempted to convert my coworkers and clients into my friends. In an effort to make work more fun for me, I sometimes made it silly. Rather than being a leader with a sense of humor, I had become a clown looking for laughs. My colleagues didn't know what I was up to, and we had a lot of fun along the way. Ultimately, however, many of these relationships were based on business, and when it came time to make tough decisions, I always put the business first. This was the wrong way to try and foster lasting friendships.

Over the years, there have also been a few friends who've resurfaced and wanted to revive our friendship back to the way it once was. This was not a priority for me. While the reunion was sweet, the time and energy required to maintain meaningful friendships were beyond what I could afford to offer at the time. I was over-subscribed, so I selfishly attempted to transform my old friends into coworkers. Unfortunately, I always put the business first, and as a result, have eventually ruined a few of these reunions. Through nearly two decades of attempting to mix my desire for friendship with my passion for business, I had nearly forgotten how to be a real friend.

Are you driven in your career and finding you've got little room for relationships? Are you trying to make friends at work out of sheer convenience and efficiency?

Unfortunately, this lesson has required many accumulated years of hindsight before I could see the impact of my selfishness. In fact, it has taken a lot of effort to pull back from being mono-focused on my career and begin building meaningful relationships based on something other than just business. Believe it or not, reconnecting with neglected friends on Facebook has been the catalyst for remembering how precious and important friendships can be in your life. I had forgotten that feeling, and making time to see old friends again in person has been remarkable!

I am sharing what I've learned with you today so you may succeed in your relationships where I have failed. There is great vulnerability in openly sharing shortcomings for the benefit of others, but this is ironically what friends do for one another. My hope for you is that you'll learn from my mistakes and find a reasonable balance between growing your business and keeping your friends. If you've been unavailable for a long time as I had been, I encourage you to reconnect and reunite with those who love you. When you do, you'll find it can truly be as today's fortune says, "You will soon be surrounded by good friends and laughter."